FULL NAME:  Rachel Suzanne Neumeister
STUDENT COUNCIL POSITION: The honourable, high and mighty, “that is ‘ma’am’ to you” Publications Editor
HOMETOWN: A-town-you’ve-never-heard of, Ontario  (A.K.A. Linwood)
 

CURRENTLY RESIDES: Room 6, Lower Lehman, Emmanuel Bible College, Kitchener, Ontario, Canada, North America, Planet Earth, Milky Way, Solar System, Universe
HOME CHURCH: Woodside Bible Fellowship in Elmira
FAMILY: Daddy, Mommy, Brother
PETS: No
HOW DID YOU GET TO EBC: Some uncertainty, some convincing from the parental unit, some more uncertainty, probably some God’s leading in there too, and then a car.
EDUCATIONAL BACKGROUND: My parents taught me most of the stuff I know, well anything that’s of importance at least.  I suppose I should give some credit to Linwood Public School and Elmira D.S.S. too.
FAVOURITE BOOK AND WHY: Other than the Bible, I don’t even know.
FAVOURITE FOOD: BBQ’d meat-anything, some form of potatoes and some form of veggies—OH! corn on the cob, all homemade of course.  And some orange juice and raspberry pie with ice cream for dessert
FAVOURITE BIBLE VERSE: “But, my child, be warned:  There is no end of opinions ready to be expressed.  Studying them can go on forever and become very exhausting! … Fear God and obey his commands, for this is the duty of every person.”  (Ecclesiastes 12:12,13)
MOST INFLUENTIAL PERSON AND WHY: My parents (I can’t narrow it down to “person”.)  To summarize, my dad formed how I think and my mom how I act and I owe so much to them for giving me the best childhood ever!
FAVOURITE CARTOON CHARACTER AND WHY: Arnold from Hey Arnold! is a pretty cool kid, as is Francine from Arthur, and I don’t know a reason why.  Coolness can’t be explained.
DREAM VACATION: AUSTRALIA (it won’t be a dream in 22 days and counting)
COURSE YOU WOULD LOVE TO TEACH OR TAKE AT EBC AND WHY: I would love to take “Nap Time”.  Tuition for this course would of course be free, with comfortable beds and blankets provided.

IF YOU COULD CHANGE PLACES WITH ANYONE FOR A DAY AT EBC-WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY: Brittany Rice because I am always in awe of how she balances everything so well.  Teach me, oh wise one!

A QUOTE FOR THE MASSES: “The only time my education was interrupted was while I was in school” – Mark Twain

NAME YOU WISH YOU WERE GIVEN: Rachel.  Oh wait! I don’t have to wish!

BLOOD TYPE: No, I don’t think it can.
FAVORITE TV SHOW (S): No, thank you.

WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW? A black t-shirt, pajama shorts, undergarments, a hair elastic, a ring and glasses.
HOW DO YOU WANT TO DIE? Quick and painless; I shall not get into details. 

MOST MEMORABLE PUBERTY EXPERIENCE: In grade six gym class, when we were learning about the changes that will happen to us through puberty, the teacher handed out sample deodorant sticks saying “you will need to use this someday”.  I didn’t take any because I already had my own.  Then when I got back to the classroom, someone had put a stick of the deodorant in my desk with a note saying “I saw you didn’t take any.  Use this, you need it.”  I was so insulted.

IF YOU COULD GO ON A DATE WITH ANYONE AT EBC, WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY?  Who writes these questions anyway?

BIGGEST LIBRARY/VIDEO STORE LATE FEE: I think I had a book here that was about six months overdue (I lost it), but the fine got waived because someone happened to donate the same book back. 

EMBARRASSING STORY (50-100 words):
Well, the puberty experience is right up there, but I will add another one for your comedic benefit.  It doesn’t seem bad in hindsight, but at the time I was horrified.  We were hanging out as a family, my parents and my brother and me, and I declared that I had never been truly embarrassed before. (I was probably around 10 years old.)  So my dad sought to change that, snuck up behind me and pants’ed me. 

FULL NAME: Jordan Robert Vetro

STUDENT COUNCIL POSITION: The less honourable, less high and less mighty assistant editor of the prestigious and most excellent Voice of Emmanuel Bible College and Institution for the Culinary Arts

HOMETOWN: Alliston Ontario, a thriving rural community that exists solely because of a bunch of potato farmers (every year we have a potato festival to commemorate how hick we are) and a Honda plant about twice the size of a small European kingdom.

CURRENTLY RESIDES: Here

HOME CHURCH: Alliston Alliance Church

FAMILY: 1 Father, 1 Mother, 3 Sisters, 1 Brother, 1 Dog, 8 Colonies of Toe Fungus, 3 varieties of moss growing in my closet and 17 illegal immigrants who hide under my bed.

PETS: Note the aforementioned Canine

HOW DID YOU GET TO EBC: In a car. . . what kind of question is that?

EDUCATIONAL BACKGROUND: My sister often quotes “I never let school interfere with my education.” That’s a good plan. Outside of school you learn all the important things. Like how to cut your toenails and eat different varieties of natural dirt. But aside from that my education is very conventional.

FAVOURITE BOOK AND WHY: Of course here I pay homage to the Bible, which hopefully is implied to each of us and transcends such consideration. But to the EBC community I recommend the overly recommended Lord of the Rings trilogy, and request that no one disregard fantasy as useless, as it is in the time devoted to such fancies that we develop imaginations that will aid us even up until our personal lives become dull and tired.

FAVOURITE FOOD: Pasta, and the fine cuisine of my Italian heritage, which boasts much better food certainly than many other societies. (Hungarians take note)

FAVOURITE BIBLE VERSE: Deuteronomy 31:8 says “The Lord goes before you and will be with you. He will never leave or forsake you. Do not be afraid and do not be discouraged.”

MOST INFLUENTIAL PERSON AND WHY: My mum who inspires all the best points of my personal morality, my father, who is responsible for my love of theology and the respect I hold for ministry, my closest friends and mentors for holding me accountable, and for the whole of the French Parliament, for always standing up as a firm example for me of what not to do.

FAVOURITE CARTOON CHARACTER AND WHY: Jughead Jones. Never doubt the soundness of mind of someone who can stand up in the face of all of the drama which is endured by his friends, and understand the importance of just loving life (and the food you partake in within it)

DREAM VACATION: Italy, and the whole European tour. Not to sound sacrilegious but that is best described as my Mecca, my personal journey towards lifelong completion. I maintain the romantic idea that nothing would more satisfy my personal love of history, culture and elegant foreign cuisine.

COURSE YOU WOULD LOVE TO TEACH OR TAKE AT EBC AND WHY: Theological Seminary. I would love to sit in on an intellectual environment, teach and discuss the issues which are today addressed and challenged by so many respected (and less respected) Church leaders and teachers.

IF YOU COULD CHANGE PLACES WITH ANYONE FOR A DAY AT EBC-WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY: I would change places with myself. I always thought I had it far too well and would like to take that day sitting in my own place to experience the decadence and foolishness of which I partake, so that I might then better approach and correct myself for all of my moral and intellectual fallacies and inaccuracies.

A QUOTE FOR THE MASSES: “I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance.”
Socrates

NAME YOU WISH YOU WERE GIVEN: Carl. Never before has there been such an elegant and yet pleasingly aesthetic title as this.

BLOOD TYPE: I don’t know and it won’t tell.

FAVORITE TV SHOW (S): M*A*S*H, and of course the Three Stooges, which is secretly the favorite television series of every human being. It is what Kant would call an apriori aspect of our being. Something embedded within all of us.

WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW? Don’t call me scandalous if I say I’m wearing clothes. These include an intense t-shirt bearing an original STAR WARS poster, an elegant and immensely classy pair of Converse All-Stars and a very patriotic pair of boxers. Of course we may also hear bear homage to the single greatest pair of eyewear known to human kind, the John Lennon special. (Relate this most excellent aspect of my attire to a certain boy-wizard and I shall break you ‘neath the might of my powerful wand)

HOW DO YOU WANT TO DIE? I want to be secretly and subtly crept upon by a powerful hoard of monkey-ninjas commissioned by none other than an underground terrorist sect secretly working for the government of Nepal. If death works to take me in any other fashion I shall refuse outright.

MOST MEMORABLE PUBERTY EXPERIENCE: Here I extend my gravest apologies and inform you that personal denial and hours of therapy have made quite sure that every puberty experience in my lifetime has been erased from my psyche in entirety.

IF YOU COULD GO ON A DATE WITH ANYONE AT EBC, WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY? Myself. Despite my aforementioned lack of morality I’ve always had a great admiration for myself. (and if any one of you takes such a satirical comment as this as any indication of my character than I apologize for the fact that I sound like such a conceited fellow. Perhaps it is the terror of making a serious comment that brings upon such a comment, but I will leave such an assumption to the reader)…or Simon Boucher, because he’s so pretty.

BIGGEST LIBRARY/VIDEO STORE LATE FEE: I try to remain punctual in all my library/video store doings. Either that or I have never had any need for extra information or entertainment on the grounds that I am personally so intellectual and exciting. Again I put that forward to the reader.

EMBARRASSING STORY (50-100 words): I am reminded of the time I attempted to shoot the apple of the Kaiser’s head. Needless to say my aim was a bit off and things didn’t go well for the Kaiser.